I was at work when the passing of Seau was brought up in discussion.  Immediately it led to the discussion of how many former San Diego Chargers from the 2008 or 2009 season are no longer with us.  The conversation then went to, “Isn’t it funny how all these guys make all that money and soon after they retire they file bankruptcy or commit suicide?”  To me the answer was an emphatic no.  It’s not funny, and I know that “funny” was not used in the sense of it being humorous.  It’s a tragedy and I understand how it comes about.

Let’s take into consideration the life of a celebrated NFL player.  I do not want to lose my point in statistics.  Suffice it to say that the majority of individuals who have enjoyed a celebrated career in the NFL started playing this sport at around age 9 or 10.  From Pop Warner Leagues they went on to high school and then to college perfecting their ability to play that game with the hopes of being drafted into the NFL ranks.  Once they got to the NFL, everyday they had to maintain their focus on getting better and helping their teams to win.  Saying that a celebrated NFL player stays in the league for ten years, we can view a not so obvious fact.  For 20 years this person’s mentality, focus, way of looking at life and way of being were all centered on the precepts and principles of athleticism and the game of football.  Afterwards they are expected to “return” to and blend in with normal society.  This is a huge transition.  Does this sound familiar?  Of course it does.

The same type of transition is expected of those who leave active military service.  For all, and their families, this can be a huge undertaking.  From my experience, those who have the most difficulty are those who were highly motivated and those who served in any form of special operations.  I would relate these to the celebrated NFL player.

What’s my point?  It’s simple.  It is a tragedy when our great ones take their own lives because, for whatever reason, they could not blend in a be a part of something that can be said to be smaller than what they for years trained for and became a part of. 

I think it was the Buddha who said, “We must joyfully participate in the sorrows of the earth.”  In this case we who transition must get used to being smaller than we once were and renew our minds to the understanding that we can be transition figures who can bring our current environment and circumstances up to the level where we once lived.  Also, we can learn to live love – ourselves and others and come to the understanding that what we once did does not determine what we can and will do. 

Tell me what you think.  Leave a note.

Semper Fi,

Walter

I find it exhilarating to go on to new challenges and the changes that come with embracing new challenges.  As I have often found, coming from a prior active military service perspective, many of the changes, and challenges for that matter, I face in the civilian world can be handled by what I learned while on active duty.  I will share such a challenge today.

As you have probably read, I was an infantry officer while in the Marines.  In my early training I was taught on how I should react if I find my unit in an ambush.  Although counter intuitive, the lesson/solution is very simple; turn in the direction of the fire, return fire and fight through the assault.

 Those who have not served may say, “That’s nuts!  Why not turn-around or run in the opposite direction of the fire?”  It’s simple.  When in an ambush, we are in a kill zone.  The kill zone is an area where the enemy has a pre-determined, wide sector to fire upon us.  While trying to run out of the kill zone we are unable to defend and in effect we become easy pickings.  As far as running in the opposite direction of the fire, we are still in the kill zone and will merely be shot in the back.  Therefore the surest way to survive is to turn in the direction of the fire, return fire and fight through the assault.  What does this have to do with my “new challenges”? 

 In my new job, I have found myself, publicly, having to answer for situations and results that I was unaware were my responsibility to produce.  I have been ambushed.  The question is, “Should I turn in the direction of fire, return fire and fight through the assault?”  In the answer lies a difference from our military indoctrination and returning to live in the civilian sector.

Before answering the question it is imperative that we return to some definitions and concepts that have been described many times throughout this site.  First, keep in mind that the biggest difference you are experiencing after leaving active duty is that you have left a system founded on interdependence and joined (re-joined) a system founded on independence.   In the system of interdependence all members look out for the well-being of each other, while in independence everyone is out for themselves.  Second, remember that those who operate from independence are in effect coming from a lower level in maturity than those operating out of interdependence and, are unaware that they are doing so.

Here’s the answer to the question.  As we have learned from our military experience, the surest way to survive an ambush (keep your job and be successful in all relationships) is to turn in the direction of the fire, return fire and fight through the assault.  In other words, we should face our “attackers”, respond to what we are being “attacked” by and eliminate the source of the “attack”.  Let me explain further.

In military association we are attacked by our enemies.  In civilian life we are “attacked” by our bosses or those whose authority we find ourselves under or those whose opinions of us we desire to be favorable.  It would not be very helpful if we viewed these individuals as enemies; however, the effects feel very much the same. 

What we are really experiencing is coming under the judgment of those coming from a foundation of independence.  And what is really happening, whether it is our responsibility or not to produce, they are not getting what they want.  In their attempts to do so, they search out those around them to get it for them. From their perspective, if they are not getting what they want, instead of cooperating they compete and determine that someone has to be in their way or is the blame.  It’s again important to realize that cooperation or looking out for the well-being of all involved is interdependence.  They have not reached this level.  Here’s the how to “turn in the direction of fire, return fire and fight through the assault.”

1. Acknowledge and forgive your attackers.  As they are coming from a lower level of maturity, they do not know what they are doing.
2. Discover what it is that they are not getting.  That is the source or reason for their attacks.
3. Be a light in an area of darkness (be known for finding solutions).  Deliver, if you are able to or if is your responsibility to produce, what they are not getting.

In the example I started with, the solution I have applied is to understand that my bosses are holding me responsible for results that they have not clearly articulated.  Instead of arguing or defending myself, I forgave them for their expression of dissatisfaction.  I have asked for clarity of their desired results.  I have put together a plan and have taken actions to deliver the results that have now been articulated.  I choose not to see them as my enemy, but as my ally who is still learning to see things from a higher perspective.

This is a sure fire method for surviving ambushes in the civilian world.  Please take note.  Just because you survive one ambush does not mean that there will not be more.  Figuratively speaking, once you leave active military service, because of your foundation on interdependence, you are in “enemy” territory.  As such, you must be constantly aware and maintain situational awareness.  There will likely be many more ambushes.

Until next time:

Believe that you are worthy of living the life your desire to live.  Understand that there are greater forces at work in your life.  Trust that these forces conspire with you to live the live a life of joy and abundance.

Tell me what you think.  Leave a reply.

Semper Fi,

Walter

First and foremost, I hope and trust that all is well.

 Today I am writing to wish you a happy and prosperous new year.  I am excited and encouraged.

 Over the past year I had a number of revelations.  What I mean by revelations is that new thoughts and ideas came to me in such a way that left me astonished and inspired.  One such revelation, which may be nothing or a “so what” to many, was that words don’t teach.  We learn through experiences.

 I am excited about this revelation because I received it as I considered the very thing I write and speak about.  That is, I received this revelation as I considered the intention of this site (www.transitionfromthemilitary.com). 

 I was reminded that the transition experience is just that.  It is an experience and by embracing it is how we make the transition and can help others in their transition.

 It may appear to be contradictory that I write and speak (using words) about the transition experiences, then say that words don’t teach, but experiences do.  Here is another one of those paradoxes. 

 Words in and of themselves do not teach, but words lead to thought and those thoughts may lead to actions and from these actions we have experiences.  Experiences are how we learn.  In effect, words do teach.

 I know.  This sounds confusing, but it is very simple.  As you read articles on this site, apply them to your lives and gain your experiences; transition experiences.  From these experiences I am confident that you will learn what is necessary for you to make a successful transition from the military to civilian life.

 I am encouraged that making the transition from the military will be both possible and easier than it used to be.  Recently, there has hardly been a day where I have not heard on the radio or on TV about groups of veterans forming to help other vets.  This is encouraging because I have the belief that vets and their families can truly assist in the transition experience.

 The surest way of making a successful transition is to have principles as our centers.  Meaning, base our lives on principles rather than on simple tactics and focusing on what we are missing from our lives.  On a personal note, the principles I base my life on are those found in the Bible.

 Happy New Year!  Be fruitful and multiply. 

 You are worthy of the life you desire to live; there are other forces operating in your life and these forces conspire with you to live a life of joy and abundance.

 Semper Fi,

Walter

Once…Always…

Once I was young and I dreamed a lot.

I dreamed about life, about love, about belonging.

Once I was young and I dreamed a lot.

I dreamed about tall ships, foreign shores, and belonging.

Once I was young and I dreamed a lot.

I dreamed about battle, ceremony, status and belonging.

Now I’m not as young, but I see that my dreams have served me well.

I have been on tall ships and I have landed on foreign shores.

I have been around for battle and I have marched to the cadence of the drum.

I have had status and I have belonged.

Now I’m not as young.

I live. I love and it is to my dreams that I belong.

Happy Birthday to all Marines; past, present and future, wherever you are.  And Veterans of all wars; you are not forgotten.

Semper Fi,

Walter

Watch video. Read the post. Watch the video.

This is Walter Perkins, the founder of Transition From the Military dot Com and the author of From End of Active Service to Prosperity: Life Navigation and the Life Navigation Work Book.  In this post I am going to tell you about the most important question you can ask yourself while transitioning or after transitioning from active military duty and why asking this question might take the fear and confusion out of making major life changes, including making the transition from the military.  This might be the only question you’ll ever need to answer-making it simple to live a life of joy and abundance.

The question is very simple.  It is, “What do you want?”  What do you want to be?  What do you want to do?  What do you want to have?  What do you want?

This is one of the most astonishing and powerful questions anyone can ask and answer.  The reason this is the most astonishing question is, most people rarely think about it.  It is as if people believe life only offers a limited number of choices and it’s our job to choose.  The answer to this question provides awareness as to our beliefs and the results we get in life.  The reason it is the most powerful question is it clearly defines our lives.  From answering this question comes purpose or focus.

Having purpose or focus is powerful, and it makes us powerful.  Let’s use a familiar example to illustrate this.

The sun illumines our planet and provides that which is necessary to making life on earth possible.  The energy that our sun produces far exceeds any single atomic bomb we have created, actually many times over.  Yet, the rays from the sun do not incinerate everything on our planet.  However, those same rays, when put through a tiny magnifying glass can set most things ablaze.  This is the power of focus.

Knowing and understanding our core beliefs, what we think is possible; together with our thoughts and actions; makes up the same type of focus and incredible power.  This power is in us and is what we are.  We connect with this power when we know what we want.

It has been my experience when I have asked this question I got two responses.  One was of very little detail; such as, “I want enough money to cover my bills.”  The other has been, “I don’t know what I want.”

When someone has responded that they want enough to cover their bills, I immediately ask, “Is that it?”  Most of the time, with a sense of irritation, I then have gotten, “Well isn’t that enough?  I don’t want to be greedy.”  Then I say enough is not enough and I commence to fire off the following questions.

1. Do you every plan to go on vacation?
2. Do you ever just want to do something nice for someone else?
3. Occasionally would you like to get dressed up and go out to a fancy restaurant and spend the night out on the town?
4. Do you need new clothes or appliances?
5. What about the car that you drive?  Do you like it or do you want a new one?
6. Is your house to your liking?

After a number of these questions, and I can go on, the other person realizes that just having enough to cover their bills is simply not enough.  They actually want a lot more.

Until you get to the point of wanting you will never experience fulfillment.  Fulfillment is an experience/a feeling/a state of being.  That is what we want.  We want to create and perpetuate experiences.  Whether it is to have excellent health where we have the vigor, vitality and flexibility to physically do whatever we want or to have enough money to see new places and have a peace of mind or become the type of person where all of our personal relationships are harmonious and come from Win-Win perspectives, we want experiences.

If you do not know what you want, you will get anything.  At the worst, you will get nothing.  This reminds me of Alice in Wonderland.  Alice asks, “What direction should I go?”  She receives the reply, “Where are you going?”  Alice says, “I don’t know.”  It is then replied, “Then it doesn’t matter which direction you go.”  That’s not an advantageous approach to living.  What do you want? 

A good resource to help you get clear can be found in Life Navigation.  You can learn more about Life Navigation in From End of Active Service to Prosperity: Life Navigation and the Life Navigation Workbook.  Go to the product page and get your copies now. 

As to the response, “I don’t know what I want…” the answer is simple.  There are things is our lives that we do not desire so at least we want the opposite.  That’s a good place to start. 

Well, that’s it.  Now answer the question.  What do you want to be, do, and have?

Until next time:

1. Believe you are worthy of the life you desire to live.
2. Understand that there are greater forces at work in your life.
3. Trust that these forces conspire with you to live a life a joy and abundance.

Don’t for get to subscribe to this site so you can get a series of free reports starting with “The Truth About Making the Transition from Active Military Service to the Civilian Sector as I Experienced It.” Now, get on with answering the question.  WHAT DO YOU WANT?  What you want to be, to do and to have?

Tell me what you think.  Leave a reply.

Semper Fi,

Walter

(Below is the transcript of the video.)

Hey this is Walter Perkins, the founder of Transitionfromthemilitary.com and the author of From End of Active Service to Prosperity: Life Navigation and the Life Navigation Workbook.  In this video you will learn a major consideration to make when writing your military to civilian resume; thus, translating your military occupational specialty and what you accomplished while on active duty to a civilian job description – making it more likely that you get a job based on your desires and skill sets.

Ok let’s face it.  There will not be a one-to-one correlation between what you did in the military and what the civilian work force has a need for.  Of course there will be some exceptions; like, driving and working on trucks is driving and working on trucks.  However, there will be some nuances that make this skill different in the civilian world.  Actually, this can be said of all MOS.  If this is true, and I believe it to be, what’s the major difficulty with translating your MOS to a civilian job description?  It’s simple.  What you did in the military is not necessarily what you want to do when you get out.

For years one of the biggest mistakes I made when trying to get a job was I was focused on what I did, rather than on what I wanted to do.  And, I prepared my resume accordingly.  What was the result?  I got job offers for what I used to do instead of for what I wanted to do.  Here’s the rub.  I had the skill sets for what I wanted but my resume – or sales letter- did not reflect it.  Here’s a secret.  When you write a resume or meet with groups, organizations and/or friends for the purpose of getting a job, you are conducting a marketing campaign.  Here’s another secret.  With all successful marketing campaigns there is a message to market match.  Here’s an example of what I am talking about.

To be interviewed on the Oprah show would be an accomplishment. However, would she have a combat sniper on her show to talk about the skills it takes to locate, acquire, and eliminate a target?  The answer is most likely NO. She may however, have this sniper on her show if the topic was, how after serving as a sniper and returning home, led to spousal abuse and now, together, the family has gone through counseling and are living a happy and productive life.  The point here is that the second topic (message) possibly matches the audience (market) for the Oprah show.  In relation to our discussion, the point is, make sure your resume highlights the skills and experiences that are aligned with what you and the potential employer desires, and not with what you have merely done.  Another way of saying this is when writing your resume and translating your MOS come from the mindset of strategy not tactics.

Let’s think of tactics as the “how” you approach and achieve objectives.  And, let’s think of strategy as the “how” to reach an end-state.  Taking these light definitions into consideration let’s, say your strategy for a getting a job you will enjoy doing is accomplished by writing a dynamic resume and networking.  It is implied that your resume is written to support what it is YOU desire to do and you meet with groups, organizations and/or friends that can get you in front of those people who can provide you the opportunity to do what YOU desire to do.  There’s a subtlety here.  Did you catch it?  Here it is. Don’t write your resume or network until you know what you want to do.  When you know what you want to do, you will find it easier to look back on your MOS and experiences and highlight your skills required to do the job.  Trying to translate your MOS and write a resume without knowing what you want to do is like being a combat sniper trying to get an interview on the Oprah show talking about the skills that are required to locate, acquire, and eliminate a target.  Get clear first.  Establish a message that matches your market.

A good resource to help you get clear can be found in Life Navigation.  You can learn more about Life Navigation in From End of Active Service to Prosperity: Life Navigation and the Life Navigation Workbook.  Go to the product page and get your copies now.

While there are many resources and organizations that can help you to translate your MOS to a civilian job description, the most important thing to remember is your message to market match.  Focus on your strategy not just your tactics. This is a major consideration to make when writing your military to civilian resume.

Until next time:

1. Believe you are worthy of the life you desire to live.
2. Understand that there are greater forces at work in your life.
3. Trust that these forces conspire with you to live a life a joy and abundance.

Oh yeah.  Don’t for get to subscribe to this site so you can get a series of free reports starting with “The Truth About Making the Transition from Active Military Service to the Civilian Sector as I Experienced It.”

Tell me what you think.  Leave a reply.

Semper Fi,

Walter

Today I will tell what is probably the important thing you need to know when making a major life change, including transitioning from active military service.  From this short teaching you might be empowered to make powerful decisions which will result in attaining great results in your life.

Often the first thing people think about when moving to a new stage in their lives is how they will present themselves to others.  In regards to making the transition from the military, this means writing a resume.  The second thing that usually occurs is getting this resume in front of the right person to get a job.  One of the best methods for doing this is through networking.  Although both of these, writing your resume and networking, are extremely important, neither will bear good fruit unless they result in a successful interview and an offer for employment.  So the questions are 1) how do you get granted an interview?   And 2) how do you get an offer for employment?  The answer is, be the right person for the job.  Of course this leads to others questions such as, “How do I become the right person for the job?”  This is a question I will help you with today.

People buy from people they know like and trust.  The same thing goes for hiring.  I have seen hundreds of resumes and have sent out many more.  Of the resumes I considered meeting with someone on, I looked for specific characteristics.  They were:

1. Did they work with others?
2. Were their experiences in line with what I was looking for?
3. Did they show progression from one position to the next?
4. One final consideration I would make was, based on what is in a resume; did it appear that the candidate will be a cultural or organizational match?

You may not realize it but understand that as an employer these are things that are looked for. Remember that a resume is essentially a sales letter and you are the product.  Keeping these things in mind may greatly assist you in writing your resume.  Here is a simple format for writing a resume.

1. Write a heading telling what you are looking to do or a brief statement that may imply what you bring to the table.
2. Next, create headings or bullets talking about your most recent positions/jobs in descending order.
3. Under each heading insert bullets that tell of your accomplishments (Hint: Talk about dollars saved/earned and levels of responsibility.)
4. Next, write a heading about your education and follow-up with bullets talking about degrees, certifications or qualifications earned.
5. Finally, write a brief section about your interests and hobbies.

Writing about your interest and hobbies may not make sense to you; however, remember that people buy form those they know, like and trust.  Your interests or hobbies may be a “hot button” for the person doing the hiring.  After preparing your resume, it’s time to network.

Net working is about meeting-up with like-minded people.  Again, keep in mind that people buy from those they know, like, and trust. This means:

1. Meet with those in the same field, business, or company you are interested in.
2. Ask for referrals.
3. Only send your resume or ask for an interview to companies that you know, like and trust.  This implies that you will have to do some research.  The point is, you want a job that you enjoy doing.

That is all networking is.  It is finding groups, organizations and making friends.  Most of the jobs I got after leaving active duty came by way of referrals.  However, there was one major thing that worked in my favor.  When referred, I was the right person for the job.

So, how do you become the right person for the job?

1. Get clear on what you want to be, do, or have.
2. Write your resume and network with those that can assist you in getting what YOU want.
3. Before sending out you resume or agreeing to an interview, research to know with whom you are meeting (Hint:  Don’t just know the person you are going to meet with, get to know the company – products, services, clients, and their culture).

Well, that’s it folks.   In this brief teaching we spoke about things you were probably already aware of.  We talked about tailoring your resume, networking and doing your own research.  The most important thing however begins with you.   The only way you might be offered employment is by being the right person for the job.  The way to be best prepared for being the right person is for you to have a clear picture as to who you want to be, what you want to do and what it is you desire to have.  A great resource for getting clear on these three questions is Life Navigation.  You can learn about Life Navigation in From End of Active Service to Prosperity and the Life Navigation Workbook.  Go to the product page and get your copies now. 

I can’t say it enough.  While going through major life changes, including transitioning from active military service, the most important thing is, it begins with you, knowing what you want to be, do and have.

Until next time:

1. Believe you are worthy of the life you desire.
2. Understand that there are greater forces at work in your life.
3. Trust that these forces are conspiring with you to live the life joy and abundance.

Oh yea.  Don’t forget to subscribe to this site so you can get a series of free reports, starting with “The Truth About Making the Transition From Active Military Service to the Civilian Sector; As I Experienced It”.

Tell me what you think.  Leave a reply.

Semper Fi,

Walter

(Below is the transcript for this video.)

Hey this is Walter Perkins, the founder of www.transitionfromthemilitary.com and the author of From End of Active Service to Prosperity: Life Navigation and the Life Navigation Work Book.  Today I am going to tell you about these books and why reading them might take the fear and confusion out of making major life changes, including making the transition from the military.  These might be the only resources you’ll ever need-making it simple to live a life of joy and abundance.

 What is From End of Active Service to Prosperity: Life Navigation?  It is a story that tells of a young man, who has gotten frustrated with his life and plans drastic measures to take the things he believes he and his family deserve (Hint: He’s a former Marine who is having challenges while transitioning to civilian life.)  In the process he has a chance encounter that helps him see that his only problem is in his perception.

Before we go any further, again, I will tell you my story.  I’m a graduate from the University of South Carolina.  Upon graduation I was commissioned a 2^nd Lieutenant in the Marines.  While in the Marines I excelled.  I held command at the recruit training depot (MCRD) at Parris Island, S.C.  I was selected to and completed Amphibious Warfare School (AWS) in Quantico, VA and I commanded and deployed a Re-enforced Infantry Rifle Company to Kuwait.  When I resigned my commission, I entered the civilian world proud, confident and excited.  I immediately found a job.  However, eighteen months later, without warning, I lost my job.  Very soon I found myself broke, alone and despondent.

As a result of my drastic and unexpected fall, I had to find a solution to get me back on track.  I found it.  I applied it.  And, now I am sharing it with you.   That solution is Life Navigation; the five step plan that makes transitioning from the military child’s play.  Transitioning is process, but when you know what you are doing you can have confidence; you can have fun; and you can approach life in a relaxed playful manner.  Life Navigation is introduced and described in From End of Active Service to Prosperity and is thoroughly taught in the Life Navigation Workbook.

You are probably asking, “Well what is Life Navigation and how does it help me?”  Those are good questions.  Life Navigation is a very systematic strategy for living.  It includes:

1. Having a compass: A set of principles to use as your direction finding tool.
2. Having a map: Developing and maintaining specific values.
3. Conducting an Orientation:  Determining your here and now reality and ensuring your compass and map are in alignment.
4. Having a mission: Creating a personal mission statement. 
5. Stepping off:  Taking actions that support your mission statement. 

 When you transition from active military duty to the civilian world, you are going to have to take action.  More important, you have to take proper action.  What is proper action?  It’s action that follows accurate thought.  Action without accurate thought leads to confusion and chaos.  Action following accurate thought leads to clarity and success.

Order your copies of From End of Active Service to Prosperity and The Life Navigation Workbook now.

• You get instant access that allows you to get started immediately so that you can start taking the steps to live a life of joy and abundance. 
• They come in an easy to read PDF format that allows you to read at your leisure, print and bound or  copy to a portable device like and iPad; providing you the opportunity to read and re-read as often as you like wherever you like.
• It’s interactive.  When printed the workbook has spaces to conduct fill-in-the-blank exercises that makes this a personal journal you can use over and over again.

Click on the product page in the upper tool bar and order now.  Get on with living the life you desire and deserve to live.

Until next time:

1. Believe you are worthy of the life you desire.
2. Understand that there are greater forces at play in your life.
3. Trust that these forces conspire with you to live a life of joy and abundance.

Oh yea.  Don’t forget to subscribe to this site so you can get a series of free reports, starting with “The Truth About Making the Transition From Active Military Service to the Civilian Sector; As I Experienced It”.

Tell me what you think.  Leave a reply.

Semper Fi,

Walter

P.S. Check out and pass on the following link to anyone you know who is making the transition from the military, who is having challenges with the transition, family members and friends.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=n6UlwcA0-QM

As a child I was brought up in the Baptist church.  Often we would spend the entire day (Sunday) at church.  We would begin with Sunday school, and then go to morning worship.  We would go home or out for dinner and return for the evening service.  From those early years I was introduced and indoctrinated in living by faith.  As I grew older I questioned the beliefs I held.  I attended different churches and different faiths.  In time, I became an avid reader.  It was as if I were on a quest to attain knowledge.  I studied old world religions as well as new-thought religions as well as mind sciences.  I became somewhat what many would call a “Learned Man”.  Then there came the period where I studied psychology.  I desired to learn and understand why we do what we do.  I understood that our results in life come from our actions that are the results of the habits we form as a result of the thoughts we focus upon which are based on our beliefs.  I wanted the evidence to prove this to myself and to others.  In time, it became very clear to me that we co-create our lives based on our core beliefs.  Here is an example of how powerful our core beliefs are and how we co-create our experiences/lives.

While attending college I was in the Naval Reserve Officer Training Corps (NROTC).  I knew that I was going to be a Marine officer.  My mind was set on this fact.  As such, I strove to be every part of my understanding of what being a Marine and leader was all about.  Other than our structured classes, I read books on leadership.  I read biographies and auto-biographies concerning military leaders.  I read up on Patton, Mac Arthur, Eisenhower, Chesty Puller, Omar Bradley, Sun Tzu, Attila and Cesar to name a few.  My mind had become full of the knowledge, and the many beliefs of what it took to be a great leader.  I used to say that “there is no doubt in my military mind”.  Once commissioned and gone to the Fleet Marine Force (FMF), by many accounts, I excelled.  On one fitness report from a battalion commander, while I was still a lieutenant, it was written of me that, “He commands the respect of his Marines rather than demand it, much in the spirit of General Lejune.”  For those in the Corps, you will recognize this is as pretty high praise.  I say this merely to point out that our beliefs create our dominant thoughts which create our habits…

 After leaving the Marines many of my thoughts were “military thoughts”.  This includes the way I walked, talked and approached tasks and life in general.  I bumped into problems when my habits were not congruent with the environment I found myself.  I bumped my head more times than I care to remember or talk about.  It finally donned on me that the problems I was having were thinking problems.  And from all of my studying it finally occurred to me that my thinking problems were based on my core beliefs.  “If I were ever going to get on well outside of the Marines, I needed to investigate and change some of my beliefs.”

As what became a habit for me, when it came time for me to investigate and change some of my beliefs, I turned to books, seminars, lectures and eventually to CDs, DVDs, webinars, telephone-seminars, podcasts,  and blogs.  And, as it had been in the past, I got pretty “learned”.  However, I was still having problems.  Yes I had many successes, but also many failures.  It has been as if I would take two steps forward and one step back.  I was continually facing lessons that I thought I had already mastered.  Then something miraculous happened.  I realized that I was experiencing information over-load and was trying to live-out many experiments that came from nearly every source under the sun.  I had become a broke, frustrated intellectual who was talking the talk but my life was not consistently showing results.  I say this was miraculous because it caused me to awake from “sleep walking”.

“Sleep walking” is a term I use to describe when we go through life thinking we have purpose and direction just to find out that we are working really hard, and sometimes fast, without getting anywhere.  Oh, we look busy, gain popularity/fame, and sometimes we accumulate a lot of things.  But once we have all of the things we worked really hard for, we still feel empty as if we need one more thing and everything would be perfect, but it never is.  The cure for this dis-ease/disease brings us back to beliefs, core beliefs.

When I awoke from “sleep walking”, in my heart of hearts, I asked one question.  The question was, “What is a single source I can go to for comfort and where I can find all of the answers?”  The small still voice in me said, “The Bible”.  Of course my intellectualism kicked in and figuratively I said, “Yea right.”  However, I chose to investigate.

When I decided to amass all that I had “learned”, from every source imaginable, I found something astonishing.  Every piece of work that resonated with me, I found them to “imitate” what I learned those many years ago in church.  I found that in the Bible there was a solution for everything/problem I faced.  I found that everything that I wrote or spoke passionately about was based on what I learned from reading the Bible.  I found that every time I was troubled, afraid, confused, etc. and found relief, the relief came on the heels of what I learned in church those many years ago, prayer.  My investigation led me to the revelation that all of my successes in life were the results of my core beliefs that God loves me; that all things work for good for those who love God; and whatever I ask God for, in Jesus’ name and believed, would be given to me. 

This is not intended to be a sermon or an attempt to convert anyone to Christianity.  I am merely telling a “secret” that has worked for me in making the very difficult transition from the military to civilian life.  Here it is.  It comes from the book of Proverbs and I paraphrase.  “Trust (and believe) in God with all of your heart.  Lean not to your own understandings.  In all your ways acknowledge Him (pray) and He will direct your path.”  This is the secret to making a successful transition from the military.

Tell me what you think.  Leave a reply.

Semper Fi,

Walter 

Throughout my life I have come to know that when faced with a paradox, we are operating in the realm of truth.  I know that many may feel that there is no absolute truth, that truth is relative.  I go along with this belief, situational truth, in many matters.  At the same time I endorse the reality of absolute truth as well.  When I refer to operating in the realm of truth I mean “absolute truth”.  Answering the question as to when we have made a successful transition from active military duty falls into this category.  There is an absolute answer.  Before getting to that, I will speak briefly on the terms transition and military transition.

We are continually changing.  We, as human beings, are growth seeking beings that always, sometimes unwillingly, change from one state to another.  I am referring to physical changes as well as to psychological, mental and spiritual changes.  I am also referring to changes to social status, relationship status, employment status, etc.  The list goes on.  I bring this up merely to state that everyone, very often, goes through a transition of a sort.  I understand that making transitions is a subject for all of us because we are always changing.  Speaking to former active duty military and their families I am speaking to a unique type of transition; military transition.

Military transition can be likened to many other types of transitions; mainly those that represent going from an environment where there exists very dogmatic or institutionalized sets of rules, norms and mores (i.e. large corporations, prisons, religious sects, etc.).  However, I am now addressing only from the military perspective. 

Those of us who make the transition from active military service are changing from an environment that is founded on interdependence and collaboration.  In such an environment one grows accustomed to working together as a community; having civility; and demonstrating a true desire for the well being of the other members of the community/organization.  Once we leave active military duty – transition- we move to more of an environment of independence and self-reliance, where the civility and well-being of others is not paramount.  In stating this, there is no judgment being placed on either environment.  Both have their own unique strengths and weaknesses.  The point is, they are distinctly different and the questions are raised, how does one go from success in an interdependence environment to having success in an independence environment and how does one know when this has been done?

Herein lays the paradox.  Every event and association we truly experience is somewhat imprinted in that which makes up who we are.  Stated differently, once we have successfully become a member of an organization, vestiges of that organization will always be a part of our collective memory; a part of us.  Once a Marine, always a Marine.  We cannot un-ring the bell once it has been rung.  I cannot, not be a Marine. This proposition would lead us to believe that we can never be something else, but we can.  This is the paradox.  Recognizing this helps us to understand why many of us have difficulty leaving the active duty ranks.  It is self-contradictory. The proposition states that in order for us to live, we have to let a very significant part of us die.  This is both frightening and difficult to accept.

What’s the answer?  How do we do that?  To make a successful transition from the military to civilian life we have to live in the midst of this paradox while maintaining a broader understanding of ourselves and our abilities.

Several years ago I read a book by Richard Bach.  The book is titled, Illusions: The Adventures of a Reluctant Messiah.  My first reading went by in a flash.  I thought it was such a wonderful story.  It spoke to me on a number of different levels, but mostly it was fun.  My second reading was for the purpose of hearing and understanding the hidden messages.  It was the third reading when a particular phrase took hold of me and would not let go.

Along with Richard Bach, who is a barn-storm pilot in the novel, there is Donald Shimoda.  Donald is this strange, ageless, gifted man and fellow pilot, who through broader understanding, shares with Richard the workings of the physical universe.  Donald carries around what he calls The Handbook for Messiahs.  It was one of the passages from the handbook that grasped me and would not let me go.  It is as follows:  “Learning is discovering what you already know.  Doing is demonstrating that you know it.  And, teaching is showing others that they know as well.  We are all learners, doers and teachers.”  

In this novel, the handbook for messiahs says that we are all learners, doers, and teachers.  Besides the implication that there are many messiahs, there is an implication that even messiahs have to learn to be, then do, and then teach.  That’s powerful enough, but the real power comes from the sublime message in that statement.

The sublime message I am referring to and what I call a treasure is, “Not only are we all learners, doers, and teachers; that is all we are.” 

Through my experiences it has been revealed to me that we are all beings who are here to learn, do, and teach.  All of these aspects are present in every waking hour of lives.  There will be the dominant aspect.  When we are able to discern what aspect is dominant for us, we will always have a means to become oriented and thus join in the process of our lives.  When we can get in the rhythm of these aspects, and that which is dominant, we can live freely, without fear, and with a certainty that life will provide for us whatever we require.  I think the “how” we can do this was well described by Lao Tzu who wrote:

“Fill your bowl to the brim and it will spill.

Continue to sharpen your knife and the blade will blunt.

Chase after money and security and your heart will never unclench.

Live for another’s approval and you become his prisoner.

Do your work and step back.

The only path to serenity.”

Here is my answer to the question, the truth.  “How do you know when you have made a successful transition from the military?”  The answer is you never will, but you would have when you find peace, within yourself, in doing whatever you are being after serving.

Tell me what you think. Leave a reply.

Semper Fi,

Walter